1) We don't have time to waste on "someday" if we want to create a fulfilling life. We have to start immediately.
2) Passions in your life would increase the quality of your life.
3) Obligations are obligations - they have to get done.
I feel like I have to keep speaking to people's internal critic on point #3 above. So I will do so again. Please know, that I am NOT ignoring that you have alot of things you feel you have to do. Just trust the process right now and ask yourself whether you agree with the principals I am setting forth. If you find yourself saying "Yea, sure more passion in my life would be wonderful but you don't understand how much I have to do - I have no time for passion!", then you are likely most in need of this work we are doing.
So here's the equation:
1) Slowly add passions into your life carving time out of obligation time to build momentum and belief that it can be done.
2) Repeat step 1 for the rest of your life.
I don't mean to be overly simplistic or condescending to anyone out there but I do want to stimulate your logic a bit. Take a look at the equation above. Does it make sense to you? Would you say it is accurate? O.K. maybe not simple to put into practice, but a true statement of the reality of things wouldn't you say?
So let's walk through our deceptively difficult equation.
Lest, I make any assumptions about your level of expertise in this area I will now define what I mean by "passions".
A "passion" is anything that fulfills your values and engages your emotions strongly.
This question begets another: "What is a value?"
Your "values" are those ideals which drive your authentic self. They are the ideas or concepts that make you vibrate. In short, values tell us how we should be spending our time in life. Let me interject a warning right now. The concept of "values" in our culture has been blurred with the word "morals". Please note that I am not using these terms interchangeably as I believe a person's values are a completely different concept all together. For example, in our culture we tend to morally look down our noses at "the rich" as "greedy or gluttonous" but you may indeed have a value that seeks "abundance" and "security" and these things are not necessarily antitheses of each other. Likewise, you may have a moral attitude of giving time to people who need your assistance while at the same time being very emotionaly healthy when you honor your value of "good health" by saying you have to go workout before you can come over a friend's house to help with a project.
Obviously, your morality is often closely linked to your values and I am sure there are scenarios where you morality is challenged by your values. In those cases your job is to decide what is most important TO YOU. Remember, I will guide you in these processes but the decision of who you want to be is always yours!
Two great ways to identify your values is to review "mountain top moments" and "valley experiences".
Mountain top moments - Think of the greatest moments in your life. Don't just think of what you would say if asked on national television. Answer this one alone to yourself. Don't say "the birth of my children" or "my wedding day" just because its the "right answer". It may actually be "the one night stand I had in college" or "the homerun I hit in the high school playoff game". Don't put judgments on this. We are looking for moments when you were truly alive and filled with life! Don't assume that the value you pull from a peak experience means you would necessarily do the experience again. In the "one night stand" example you may have values of "physical intimacy", "danger", "adventure" or "wildness" that can be honored in much more "moral" ways. The value we glean from the mountain top experience is much more important than the experience itself.
Valley Experiences - Think of a time where you were your most angry. Or Sad. What got you so angry? What did you feel you lost that had made you so sad? Anything that triggers strong emotions in you is likely to contain a hidden value. If you were angry at the guy who cut you off in traffic you may have a value for "civility" or "courtesy". If you were crushed when your team lost the superbowl you may have a value of "overcoming adversity" or "competitiveness".
If you have knots in your stomach when your bills arrive in the mail you may have a value of "security" or "abundance" that is not being honored by your current situation.
Use these high and low experiences to identify some of your strongest values. When you see the same ones showing up from various high and low experiences notice and identify the value. To the extent that you are honoring that value in your life, you are likely living well. To the extent that you are disregarding that value, you are likely frustrated, depressed, bored or angry in life.
There is no such thing as a lack of time. Only a lack of priorities." - Timothy Ferris
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